Most of us realize that divorce – especially one in which children are involved – is best faced with the assistance of an experienced family lawyer. This is equally true when self-employment, substantial assets or –just as important — substantial debt complicate finances.
Still, while divorce rates reportedly fell in the depths of the Great Recession, marriages held together by nothing more than inadequate cash flow cannot last forever. Proof of this is the skyrocketing percentage of divorces being prosecuted and defended without benefit of counsel.
If you find yourself in a situation where divorce is both inevitable and urgent, and the funds to retain a lawyer are completely out of reach, there are still steps you can take to protect your interests at minimal cost as a pro se litigant. Here are 6 ways to survive divorce without formal legal representation:
1.) Visit your state’s judicial web site. You can usually find it easily by searching your state’s name and the word “judiciary” or “official web site” There you will find a wealth of information on a variety of subjects many of them specifically created for do-it-yourselfers. The judicial web site will also provide you with links and templates to forms that will be needed in your divorce action. Simply browsing these forms may alert you to options you hadn’t considered. If your spouse has access to funds that are out of your control, one such option is to file a motion asking the court for an allowance from your spouse sufficient to secure legal representation once the case is underway. While not in such an immediate way, a temporary order of alimony might also help level the playing field.
2) Ask for fee waivers. Filing fees and fees for process servers can run into hundreds of dollars. If you qualify, you may be granted waivers of these fees by simply filing the appropriate application and supporting financial information.
3) Become a smart observer. Don’t wait until your hearing is scheduled to visit the courthouse. Learn when motion sessions are being held and when contested divorce cases are being heard. These sessions are almost always open to the public. Once you have sat through several contested hearings and a few uncontested divorces, you will know much more about the process and you will also be alert to some of the hurdles you might otherwise not have anticipated.
4) Find out whether your courts have dedicated pro se assistants. If so, these individuals may be able to help you sort through the paperwork to make sure you have all the documents the judge will require in order to go forward with your hearing. Be careful though. Pro se assistants, just like other judicial personnel, are not allowed to offer you legal advice. This means, for example, that while they can tell you whether your written agreement is in proper form, they cannot advise you about whether it is fair or whether you have covered all of the issues.
5) Don’t skip the discovery process. Although non-lawyers cannot sign subpoenas, court clerks generally can do so on your behalf. If you are counting on your estranged spouse to provide you with full information about income, bonuses, overtime, retirement accounts, spending history and more, you are making the most common and, in the long term, costly mistake that pro se litigants make –one that handily outstrips any short-term savings realized by foregoing legal assistance.
6) Consider engaging a lawyer as coach. This can be a win-win situation for both lawyer and client. The lawyer’s risks are minimized when he or she remains in the background and is not attorney of record. This is because once a lawyer becomes attorney of record in a case courts can require the lawyer to continue working on the case even if he or she is not being paid. Even if the lawyer is eventually allowed to withdraw from representation, losses have already accrued that may be uncollectible or, at best, difficult to collect.
From the point of view of the litigant, using a lawyer as coach has a number of benefits. While a lawyer acting in this capacity cannot attend hearings or negotiate with others on your behalf, he or she can help with any and all other aspects of preparing for negotiation or trial. What’s more, since a lawyer acting as coach is not responsible for the ultimate outcome of the case, she has the freedom to assist in limited ways according to your own needs and budget. For example, one client may want legal assistance just for preparing documents and for guidance in gathering financial information about the other party. Another individual may feel comfortable sorting out the numbers but need assistance in preparing for a hearing by organizing exhibits and questions for witnesses, or by planning overall strategy and argument to the court. Still others who have reached a tentative agreement with their spouse might simply want a lawyer to review the financial affidavits and draft agreement and offer an opinion about whether it is fair and complete. Finally, it is not unusual for litigants to seek legal assistance – either coaching or full representation only after they have run afoul of procedural rules and feel that they have reached a roadblock in their case.
Some lawyers charge their normal hourly rate for divorce coaching but others may be willing to charge a substantially lower hourly rate for these so-called unbundled services. Lawyers are quite accustomed to discussing fees; so never feel shy about asking. Our own firm charges less than half our regular hourly rate for divorce coaching services.
While self-representation – at least at the outset of a case – might be unavoidable, it is no cause for surrender. Every new challenge brings with it the possibility for ingenuity and growth.
After more than 20 years of marriage that ended in divorce in 2003, Connecticut resident Peter Larson seems to have been no stranger to the courts. When he returned to court in 2010 to seek a reduction of child support and alimony orders, he had two previous efforts at modification under his belt and probably felt confident that he would win his pro se bid for relief. After all, his income had gone from about $85,000 in 2003 to about $21,000 and he was unemployed.
And, in fact, he did come away with some degree of success without the help of a lawyer. The trial court recalculated his child support dropping it from its original level of $347 per week to $115 per week. In addition the court reduced his alimony order to $1 per year — not a permanent victory on the alimony front, but still an important win.
Unfortunately, Mr.Larson’s former wife, Matilde, did hire a lawyer who filed a counter-motion for contempt seeking past due child support and attorney’s fees. Ultimately, although he received a break in his current orders, Mr. Larson was also ordered to pay almost $100,000 in past-due support and was also ordered to pay almost $27,000 in attorney’s fees.
In a per curiam decision of the Connecticut Appellate Court scheduled for release next week, the Court upheld the trial court’s action.
As he had at the trial court level, Mr. Larson represented himself on appeal. His arguments of error were;
- The trial court hadn’t reduced child support enough
- The trial court should not have found him in contempt of prior orders
- The order of attorneys fees was excessive because the fees were unreasonable
The Court’s response to these claims makes it clear that Mr. Larson would have benefitted from consulting with a lawyer before filing his motion and, later, before filing his appeal. First, the court stressed the enormous discretion accorded to trial courts by appeals courts in family matters. It is never enough on appeal that the appellate judges might have decided the case differently. This means that strategic errors at the trail level can rarely be corrected on appeal.
Second, Mr Larson would have been cautioned that, because he was not fully in compliance with existing orders, he should have expected a counter-offense if he chose to seek a modification. Based on the amount of the arrearage that the court found, it is clear that his former wife had tolerated his non-compliance for a very long time up to the point that he made the first move in 2010. To the extent that Mr. Larson thought his current financial situation would — or even could — protect him from being held in contempt for falling behind, he was mistaken and any experienced lawyer would have made that clear to him.
Third, he would have been advised that law that requires courts to consider the respective finances of the parties when allocating responsibility for attorneys fees in divorce cases, does not apply in enforcement proceedings where there has been a finding of willful contempt. In such cases, attorney’s fees can be shifted to the party who failed to obey a court order as a simple matter of punishment.
While Larson complained that he had not been given a fair chance to challenge the reasonableness of the fees, the appellate court noted that, not only had the trial court afforded him the opportunity to do that, but had actually scheduled a separate hearing for that very purpose. Although Larson attended the hearing he did not, according to the court, present any evidence on the subject. It is not unusual for inexperienced litigants to expect the trial judge to take the lead in a factual inquiry.
In a 201o op-ed piece published in the New York Times entitled “A Nation of Do-It-Yourself Lawyers” John T Broadrick, chief justice of New Hampshire, and Ronald M. George, chief justice of California, stressed the disadvantages faced by litigants who, for financial reasons, feel compelled to go it alone. The authors urged members of the bar to step up to help mitigate the problem by offering so-called unbundled legal services so that litigants who could not afford comprehensive representation could nonetheless receive limited assistance in the form of consultation, coaching, and help with document preparation.
What many do not understand is that limited representation can be a minefield for lawyers since the rules in many states do not adequately protect them. We cannot reasonably expect lawyers who would otherwise be willing to play a supporting role in a lawsuit, to risk taking responsibility for the final outcome of litigation they do not fully control or to be required to provide additional or even comprehensive services without remuneration.
Still, in every community there are lawyers who recognize the problem and who are willing to address it as long as roles are clearly defined and the expectations are clear. When the stakes are high, it makes sense to seek them out.
Yesterday, Forbes.com published an excellent article outlining 21 common red flags of financial hanky-panky leading up to divorce.
While a few of the signs of trouble apply only to high-asset families — e.g., frequent trips to countries with soft banking laws — others signal shady maneuvers that are common at all income levels.
If you notice that your spouse’s behavior has changed when it comes to earning, spending or borrowing money and, at the same time, all is not blissful on the home front, make some notes and do a reality check of your own. Even if you find nothing amiss, the clues you record might come in handy to your divorce lawyer further down the road.
And if your spouse suddenly decides it would be a good idea to re-mortgage the house to pay off cars or business and credit card debt, by all means take the temperature of your marriage before signing on the dotted line. The bigger the hurry, the more reason to slow things down.
Connecticut, like most other states, allows for divorce — or, as we call it in Connecticut, dissolution of marriage– on a number of grounds. These grounds include, among others, adultery, willful desertion, habitual intemperance, intolerable cruelty, and the irretrievable breakdown of the marriage. It is the last of these — irretrievable breakdown of the marriage — that is almost universally used in divorce cases in Connecticut. The legislature added the grounds of irretrievable breakdown in 1973 making Connecticut one of many so-called of no-fault states. Unfortunately, this designation causes some confusion among divorcing couples to this day.
With very few exceptions, lawyers now site no-fault grounds rather than fault grounds in even the most bitterly contested cases. This is because choice of grounds relates to only one of very many issues a court must decide in a divorce. That single issue is whether the divorce, itself will be granted. The intent of adding a no-fault language to the list of grounds for divorce was to make it unnecessary for parties to present evidence of wrongdoing in order to end their marriage.
While there were some who saw the advent of no-fault divorce as destructive to the institution of marriage, the common wisdom was and remains that, by making it unnecessary to present proof of a spouse’s faults or failures just to end a marriage, couples and families could emerge from the process with minimal damage.
Still, adding a no-fault grounds to the list of fault grounds was never intended to prevent the court from hearing evidence about bad behaviour in deciding other issues in divorce cases. Instead, it only meant that judges no longer had the option to deny a divorce if there had been insufficient proof of fault such as adultery or cruelty. If one spouse testifies that the marriage has broken down irretrievably, it has, whether or not the other spouse agrees. Thus, one issue of the case has been decided.
Aggrieved spouses may still produce evidence of all sorts of wrongdoing in an effort to convince a court to award or not to award alimony, and to divide the marital property in a way that favors them. On issues of child custody and visitation, the court is obligated to resolve disputes based solely on the best interests of the children. Here, too, if one of the parties has behaved in a way that threatens the well-being of the children — everything from a pattern of disengagement, to neglect or abuse — proof of those behaviors are relevant to the interests of the children and are therefore admissible. For all of these reasons, referring to Connecticut as a no-fault state can be a bit misleading.
So, what is an uncontested divorce? It is one in which fault — whether or not it played a part in the breakdown of the marriage — is never brought to the attention of the court because virtually all issues, including custody, support, alimony, the division of property, and more, have been resolved by the parties, themselves. In those cases, the court is simply provided with an agreement which will be approved provided it is not manifestly unfair or detrimental to the interests of the children.
Even in truly uncontested divorces, the court has an obligation to review the agreement so all of the documentation that is required in contested cases, is also required in uncontested cases. This documentation includes properly completed financial affidavits. In families with children, the parties must also submit affidavits in which they swear that no other court is considering issues affecting the children.
Sometimes, cases are technically uncontested because one party is not participating. In these cases, the party seeking the divorce must also follow strict rules which assure that the absent party has been properly notified of the action and has been given a fair opportunity to participate.
Couples planning an uncontested divorce, and even individuals who expect that their absent spouse will not oppose a divorce, should still take great care to be sure that their agreement or, in the case of unopposed divorces, their proposal, is truly fair and reasonable and that it covers all of the issues that should be addressed. Although the court does have an obligation to review the agreement for manifest unfairness, it is extremely unusual for judges to interfere in any way with a completed agreement. Moreover judges are not permitted to provide legal advice to the parties who appear before them. Also, it can be nearly impossible to correct certain portion of unfair agreements once they have been made part of a decree of dissolution. Therefore, even those preparing for an uncontested divorce will benefit for the advice of experience counsel.
Statistics maintained by the Connecticut Judicial Department make it clear that victims of domestic violence may not be asking family courts for the protection they need. Instead the first court to act is often a criminal court following the abuser’s arrest.
According to the Connecticut Judicial Department, criminal courts in that state issued 8,478 family protective orders between July 1, 2011 and September 30, 2011. By contrast, family courts entered only 2,146 family restraining orders during the same period. Of these, only 804 were extended beyond 14 days. The rest were either allowed to expire or were rescinded after a hearing. While the numbers vary a bit from quarter to quarter, the ratios between criminal and civil orders regarding domestic safety remain fairly constant.
While statistics can’t tell the whole story, this does mean that the great majority of court orders offering protection from abuse are issued only after an arrest. Under Connecticut law, courts may issue protective orders at their discretion at the time of arraignment and before criminal responsibility has been determined. This benefits victims of abuse in the short run. The problem comes when the criminal case is disposed of and the protective order is no longer in effect. Then, unless the victim of abuse seeks protection in family court, he or she will be back at square one.
The situation is not much better in family court where the great majority of initial applications for relief from abuse are granted for 14 days pending a hearing but less than half are then continued for the full six-month period provided by law. Again, there are many reasons for this. In some cases, victims whose applications were granted without a hearing fail to appear for the mandatory follow-up hearing two weeks later. In other cases, after hearing the testimony of both parties, the judge is unconvinced that the restraining order is warranted.
Protective orders issued by criminal courts and restraining orders issued by civil courts are not a panacea, but they help. Victims of domestic violence need to be better educated about their options for getting civil restraining orders and keeping them in place as long as danger remains. What these statistics teach us is that—like it or not—the first meaningful opportunity to offer this education is often when abusers finally land in criminal court. This happens through the office of the Victim Advocate.
The bigger challenge is to reach those for whom that will have been too late. The goal must be to reach victims before their abusers are arrested, by which time irreparable damage may already have been done.